The Prodigal Son is giving an update

Well I finished my second semester of nursing school with a B in my main nursing course. I'm pretty happy with that! I can't believe that in about a year from now I will be GRADUATING as an RN. Wow!

Right now I'm on break till January 25th. When I start back I will be doing maternity nursing for the first half of the semester and then psych nursing for the second half. I've heard the 3rd semester is a bit easier than my past semester...I hope so. Either way, I'm looking forward to it.

Right now I'm trying to get a job at a visiting nurse service as a home health aide. Very part time. I have to go tomorrow to "test out" of the HHA test (since I already completed fundamentals of nursing, they count that as being "certified," just have to test out).

CHRISTMAS!

(here's our little house)

I have finally done some shopping. Got everyone pretty much done except my one sister. It's been such a tight christmas since I am unemployed and have ZERO income but I've still spent a little. Tomorrow night we're doing cut out cookies with my little brother, I'll have to take some pictures of that fun :)

On a sad note, today we were told by the doctors at the hospital my grandpa is in, that he only has about 3-5 days left to live :( It's not a very happy christmas now because of that. They stopped his dialysis today (and everything else) and he's been moved to hospice care. Please if you can spare some prayers, we'd appreciate it.

Emotional Day at Clinical

I'm too scared to say anything because of HIPPA but it was just a sad day :(

My life is consumed

This semester of nursing school is IN.SANE. The amt of work and material is mind numbing. My first exam is Thursday and I've barely had time to study! (although I've gone to about 6 hours of faculty led tutoring hours which were AWESOME and honestly helped me "study" better than if I was just sitting home on my own.) The test is on surgical skills (lol mostly drains and post op things), IV skills (the hardest!!), and then a few questions on fever.
  Today was my orientation at the hospital for clinical; this semester is med-surg and I'm on a floor that primarily does gynecological oncology surgeries (lots of hysterectomies!) I'm SO NERVOUS but excited about it too. Please pray that I don't totally suck at it. My clinical time is from 6:30am-3:30pm so it is an early and long day. Today I was up at 4:30am and didn't fall asleep till midnight last night before of nerves. I crashed and burned when I got home.

I skipped WW yesterday :( I was soooo tired. And I know I gained. Monday nights are just such a terrible time for me to go to meetings since I have clinical super early Tues morning. The other time at that location is Weds nights which STILL isn't very good since literally every other week I have an exam Thursday morning and I am going to be CRAMMING on Wednesday. I wish they met Thursday nights. I have a sinking feeling I'll stop going; I just don't have the freaken time in my life, at least for that location. I haven't even been tracking my points, its like a joke to me now. If anyone reading has ever been to nursing school, I know you understand. If you haven't, then you're lucky lol.

Week 7? Weigh In

I forget what week it is and I'm too lazy to go back and look. Happy to report that I lost 3 pounds this week!! I am now down 6.6 total and I got my 5 pounds lost stick tonight. I don't know how I did it because I didn't really eat that well this week!

I'm so busy!!

I started school last Tuesday and I am already swamped. I cannot convey the depth of material you must learn in literally a day. It makes me sick! And then when I try to have some downtime and relax, I can't because I feel guilty that I'm not studying. And despite all that, I still feel like I know nothing. Ah!

My weigh in last week was on Wednesday because of the holiday last Monday, and I gained .6lb :(  So I'm only at 3.6 lbs lost total right now. I knew I was going to gain. I have been eating like crap, I ate Arby's today...I just got a couple things off the dollar menu but it LITERALLY ate up all but 4 of my daily points. HUGE mistake! My next weigh in is tomorrow and I know it's going to be bad. I need to get it together...it is so easy to not pay attention to what I'm eating now since I'm so busy with everything else.

Not much else is new and I don't have much more time to write about it anyway... I have to start heading to bed!

Week 5 Weigh In

lost 1.4 pounds, so I'm down 4.2 pounds total. Slowly yet surely... gah!

Crickets

Does anyone read this anymore? Just curious. Please feel free to leave an anonymous comment! I used to have a little circle of blog buddies but everyone slowly drifted apart, and then I went on a long hiatus. I probably should start looking for blog friends again!

Week 4 Weigh In, and my life for the past week

I GAINED .8 pound. AHHH!! To my credit, I got my period yesterday; yes the exact same day as my weigh in. I usually gain 2-5 pounds when she's here, so really I have a feeling I actually lost this week, but since I had to get my stupid period, it just makes me look fat. Blah! I hate being a woman sometimes!!!! I'm commited to working out more this week.

Of course going to Trivia Night at a local bar last night probably didn't help my weight loss any, lol!

I've started prepping for school now. I did some dosage calculations last night, that are due on the first day. I need to read/take notes but man I am so bad at that. Give me homework and I'll do it, but having to read and take notes on my own is so boring to me, I just procrastinate on it so bad! Like everything else in my life, I need accountability!

I went to the Corning Museum of Glass last Thursday, http://www.cmog.org/  It.was.awesome!!!! It's about an hour and a half south of where I live, but I'd never been there. It was the most beautiful museum I've ever been to. Of course I didn't take any pics; I figured any pictures I took wouldn't capture how awesome it was. It was one of those things that you need to see in person.

I need to post some pictures. I seriously have not uploaded any pictures this entire summer, and so now it's become an overwhelming task which I keep avoiding.  I'll get to it...I promise!

Week 3? Weigh In and ramblings

Was it week 3 or only week 2? I had joined 3 meetings ago, so it was the 3rd time I was weighed, but the first time was my starting weight. SO is it only week 2 or is it really week 3?

I lost .6 lb at my weigh in on Monday. I was pretty blah about it. I worked hard this week and it was frustrating not to see more gone. I should be happy though because at least I didn't gain, and at least I lost a little. My weight is severely affected by my menstrual cycles....and I'm in my PMS week this week so I'm wondering if that messed with it. I seriously gain about 3-5 pounds when my period is visiting...I should just skip the weigh in next week. Lol just kidding of course! My mother meanwhile is down 5 pounds total and got a sticker at the meeting lol. How does she do it!

Fingers crossed for Eric again. He has an interiew tomorrow. He applied to the job and 20 minutes later they called him. We don't get our hopes up because this has happened before and nothing. I wish *I* could go in there and tell them what a great person he is and a focused worker. Seriously, when that man is on a task he thinks of nothing else but getting it done. I wish I could picket with a sign exclaiming "hire him! hire him!" But I don't think potential employers will appreciate a psycho slightly overzealous girlfriend so I'll refrain and stay home.

My mother has Thursday and Friday off so I think we're heading down to the Corning Museum of Glass tomorrow. I've never been there (although I did once go to Corning, 90 miles south of here, for a band competition when I was a sophomore in high school and in the school's colorguard to appease my mother. My colorguard/winterguard experience could be an entry all on it's own. Oy!). Anyway, I'm kind of excited about it!

I now start back to school 2 weeks and 6 days from now. AH! I cannot believe the denial I am in about it. How can this fabulously long summer be drawing to a close? Am I ready for the stress that nursing school entails? Last semester I was new and had no idea what  to expect. Now I know. Whoever said knowledge is power must have been a teacher. Knowing is scary!

Back to school clothes shopping

(Let me preface this by stating that I have no idea why my text is huge and stark black, and why, more importantly, it has a white highlight. I suspect it's due to the fact that I copied and pasted. Sorry friends, you'll just have to put up with is as techno-challenged me has no clue on how to fix it!)


I have a 7 year old (half) brother, named Mark, going into 2nd grade. (And yes, everyone thinks I'm his mother!) Today I went with him, my dad, and my grandmother to partake in some back-to-school shopping, at Target. 

It's so frustrating because he is in between sizes right now, as usual. A size XS (4/5) is too small length wise but waist wise they still fit. A size S (6/7) fits in length but is too big in the waist! ! We tried slim fit on him and they fit *ok* but some brands look better than others. A size 6 regular actually ended up being the winner though for the wrangler jeans...Thank god they have the adjustable waistbands (known hence as "AW"!!) Without that the gap in the back allows you to see his entire underwear! 
However he had to get a size 5 in khakis and blue cotton pants (the kind that kinda look like private school uniform pants haha!). And then a size 6 in cargo pants; those were a bit big but the AW helped rein him in! 

Shirts; Ugh. Size XS is a little small (they actually kind of fit but within 2 months I KNOW they will be too small) and a size Small is a tad big but I know will last him throughout the year. So we got him some cute cotton shirts, polos, and a nice button-down plaid shirt. This child better grow! 

Also got him a size small zip up hoodie...pretty big on him again. But getting an XS would be silly since a) he needs to wear clothes under it and b) he will be growing. And it was slightly small looking in the arm length. We decided being the kid who's clothes are a little too big is better than being the child with bare wrists, and high waters.

He's in a size 13 shoes now too. They were having a deal, BOGO 1/2 off, so we got him a size 13 sneaker and then a size 13.5 for when his foot grows LOL! At least he can find a size he actually fits into in shoes! 

Underwear...AGAIN he's right on the cusp. We got him a size "8" for kids that weigh 52-59 pounds. He' around 51 pounds, of course, but getting a size "6" would be a waste; he has those now and you can tell they're about to be too small. He got his Start Wars Legos that he LOVES, and then Lego Batman for good measure. Does anyone else think little boy underwear is ADORABLE? Because it is.

Anyone's kids constantly "in between" sizes? Markie is ALWAYS like that! What a frustrating thing! Oh well, he has some clothes to start school, and hopefully he grows evenly soon! I don't think he's particularly skinny and tall (his height and weight were actually in the 50th percentile for his age at his recent physical!), but apparently in clothes sizes he is a little bit uneven!

Weigh in and rude people.

Weighed in tonight and I lost 3 pounds this week. Woo hoo!

Why are some people so rude? No really, I don't understand. So I serve people ice cream part-time. I usually like it, it's fun, and I like getting out of the house to do it. 90% of customers are friendly and nice and normal. However, some people in the general public just, for a lack of a better term, suck at life. I am about to list my top annoyances at work.

#1 First off. People who let their young kids order (i'm not talking older kids, they're usually okay). Ok, I get it, you think your kid is cute and can't comprehend how everyone else doesn't think your kid is as cute as you do ( I have a 7 yr old brother and think he is the cutest kid out there too, I get it). However, when there is a long line, and I've been running around for 2 hours making people's crazy custom sundae orders, and dealing with their 'tude, and just general stress, I don't have time to listen to your 3 year old's 10-minute drawn out, whispered, baby talk order. They don't know how to order because they can't read. I'm sorry, they can't. They don't know that ice cream comes in different sizes, they don't know that there are cones or dishes. They don't know that saying "i want the rainbow" means nothing to me. Also they speak like this. I can't hear them. At.All.

(#1a While I'm on it, it's not just kids. Grown adults speak in a baby voice too. SPEAK UP. I have the motors and pumps and compressors of 5-6 freezers, refrigerators, and machines 2 feet from my ear. And some have weird rattles, buzzes, and squeaks that also add to the general noise.. I also have fans, doors banging, music playing, and people yelling inside. Do you really think I can hear you when you speak at the decimal of a pin dropping? No. I cannot. Don't get mad at me when I don't hear you change your order from chocolate sprinkles to rainbow sprinkles when I've already walked out of your vision. If you can't see me, I can't hear you. In fact, unless I am 8 inches from your face, I can't even hear you when I CAN see you.

Ok back to the kids. Your child's baby talk. I get it, they're still learning language skills and you think it's a great lesson to have them "order themselves." But you know what, I didn't ask to be your 3 year old's guinea pig. When they say a word that is clearly NOT real English yet, don't just stand there like I'm supposed to interpret this bizarre phase. I had a child order "Mapel" and upon interpretation, it was black raspberry. And no, the parent didn't tell me what the eff the kid said until I asked for clarification, and then they gave me 'tude about it. What.the.eff.  So, please tell me what they said. Better yet, order your kid's ice cream yourself! That would save us the time and frustration of me having no effing idea what your kid is saying. And if I get the order wrong, do not even try to blame me. I just got an order in a foreign toddler language with a deadbeat interpreter; this one is your fault, mom and dad.

#2  The lazy parent. You know what makes you look fatter than eating ice cream? Sitting in your car on your fat ass while you send you child to order you your ice cream. GET OUT OF YOUR CAR. Your kid is awkward at the window. They have no idea what to do. Don't even try to tell me how "awesome" your kid is at the social skill known as ordering. There is a 95% chance they are not, and you are confused about your kid's level of cognitive development. They have no idea how to handle the necessary details of an order. You tell them "I want chocolate custard" but nothing else. What size? Cone or dish? They give me a blank expression. They also have a limited concept of money. I have had more than 1 kid just walk away from the window without paying. Also, sometimes you short change them. What am I supposed to do when the kid is a dollar short and I can't even explain to them the concept of it because I'm not talking to a fully developed human. GET OUT OF YOUR CAR and deal with this! Your kid is not your slave who's sole purpose in life is to serve you. And by the way, I make your ice cream a little smaller 'cuz lord knows your lazy ass doesn't need it. And I'm annoyed.

#3 Blamers. Listen, you want to change your order. That is FINE. I won't be mad. What makes me mad is when I bring you your order, that we ALL HEARD YOU SAY, that I repeated back to you twice and you verified, and then you say "oh I didn't want that." YES YOU DID. You ordered it. Don't LIE, I know you are lying, I know what you said originally. Working with the public has made me realize that pathological liars are more common than you think. I could go on and on with examples. One lady ordered "vanilla with a chocolate hard shell' So that's what I did. I bring it to her and she gives me a look of UTTER DISGUST and horror. Also her face looked like a pig naturally, so it actually was a really great facial expression.
Her: "What is THAT?"
Me: Uh, what you ordered (I thought she was about to puke, her disgust was that great)
Her: I wanted the waffle cone with the chocolate on it, that's what I said. I didn't say THAT, you heard wrong.

Ok really? 'Cuz you did, you said those exact words. And you had no mention of a waffle cone. Also that cone you say you wanted is called a chocolate dipped waffle cone. Hard shell is a total different thing (as stated on the menu). No where in your order did you use that phrase "chocolate dipped waffle cone." Please read the menu AND the display of the cones 4 inches in front of your face that lists the exact name of what you want.

Me: (pulling it away) Ok I'll make you a new one, no problem
Her: Oh no, never mind. I'll just take that. Ew what's THAT!? (pointing to a dot of vanilla breaking through the hard shell. Which you know, is just the laws of physics)
Me: Um, the ice cream
Her: Well someone must have touched it!
Me: No one touched it. It does that. Your total is $X.XX
Her: Oh that total must include the chocolate hard shell that i DIDN'T WANT
ME (to myself): listen bitch. If you didn't want it, don't specially ASK FOR IT when you order. Also I offered to "correct" it, so if you refused my offer, then it's over with. And secondly, if you had gotten the chocolate dipped waffle cone like you wanted, it would have been even MORE money! So how you gonna complain?

I have more examples, (like the girl ordering a sugar cone and when I bring it to her saying "I didn't WANT a sugar cone!"
Me: But you ordered one.
Her: I know but I didn't want one, I wanted a regular one.
Me-to myself: Well then, you are obviously an idiot.)

However, I don't have all day to write them out, and my readers won't want to read it. I'm sure everyone has skimmed over the last couple paragraphs. Caught 'cha!

#4 Please give me 1-2 orders at a time. Do you see a pad in front of my face? I'm not writing this down. I have to mentally remember it all. Do you see waitresses doing that? No. So cut me some slack. I cannot take 5 orders at once. And the people that do this are not just ordering 5 small vanillas, or a similar easy order. They are ordering a "Mexican sundae with pecans instead of Spanish peanuts, and hot fudge instead of chocolate syrup. And peanut butter cups on that too, oh and chocolate sprinkles on the bottom, then a little bit in the middle, then more on top. Oh and can you use Panda Paws Ice cream instead of vanilla?" I have to remember all that in my head. And guess what? I don't know your favorite bizarre creation off hand. I.just.don't. And no one on earth does. So when I get 5 different orders like that all at once. My puny human mind cannot remember it. People seriously get short with me for not remembering it on their first verbal vomit.

When you order a banana split with "one scoop butter pecan, one scoop black raspberry, and one scoop caramel praline turtle, with Spanish peanuts instead of crushed nuts on the butter pecan, and cherry topping instead of strawberry topping on the black raspberry, and yuck! no marshmallow, put some caramel on the caramel praline, oh! and use hot fudge on that scoop too. But do NOT get it on the black raspberry. Oh and put sprinkles on it." Guess what? I'm going to ask you to repeat it. Please do not act amazed that I didn't catch that the first time you vomited the order out to me. We do not all live inside your mind. Please just be nice and repeat it to me!


I have more complaints but I'm wiped out now. Literally, wiped out.

School is a-comin' for me!

School starts Sept. 6th for me. I am getting scared, my friends! I should preface this by letting you know, that I am one of the most anxious/nervous/worry-some people ever. I fixate on my fear/worry and dwell on it until it happens, imagining how uncomfortable it's going to be the whole time. Then when it happens, almost always, it is not as bad as I imagined and I do fine. BUT, that doesn't stop me from starting the cycle all over again when the next unpleasant thing comes up, ohhhh no. So, consequently, the entire month of August will now be spent with me worrying obsessionally over school starting. It doesn't help that the approximately 6 inch thick "course outline" is now being sold at the college bookstore (or so I hear, I myself have not set foot onto that campus since the end of May). One of the professors for this semester emailed us with our 1st week reading for "those that want to start it now" (we're supposed to do it before the 1st day of class, but I didn't think *this* early!). And on the facebook group I belong to for my Dec 2012 class, many of them are doing all the readings and asking crazy questions and freaking me out! Now, when I say "many" it is really only, say, 6 people out of 55 members in the FB group (and about 85 in the class). But it FEELS like everybody when you're Ms. Nervy Nervous! So when I get nervous what do I do? Start avoiding and procrastinating! Yes, I have some great coping mechanisms over here. I really should start my reading though to make it easier on myself BUT I am unwilling to admit that my summer can ever be over, and that school is at the end of it. I'm not looking forward to the stress. I have been relaxed this summer (minus normal life stressors like finances, but those are always there, so they don't count anymore!) I look back on myself last semester and think, how the heck did I do that?!? When you enter a relaxed, slightly lazy state of being, it's hard to look back on your stressful, productive self and see how you "did it." I know I'll "do it" again but at this point I don't see how! Clinical. Mine is from 6:30am-3:30pm on Tuesday and I am scared. Of the time. 6:30, what? I have to get up at 5 am? There have been more days of my life that I have gone to bed at 5am then days where I have gotten UP at 5am. To say I am not a morning person is like saying the universe is not small. I applied to get into one clinical that is a B-shift, from 2-11pm, however it was a lottery and I didn't get picked. It's surgical nursing this semester, pre and post op, and I am nervous of making a 6:30am mistake! I never slept the night before my clinical last semester (okay, maybe 3-4 hours but there were a couple nights I seriously could not sleep) and I always did fine once the adrenaline rush hit me and carried me on through (although that clinical was only 6 hours long). My prior clinical instructor said I "was the best" in the clinical group, which blew me away, as when I went in for my review I was planning on hearing a laundry list of my faults as a student nurse (and believe me there are many). So I'm trying to draw on all the nice things she said (because she wouldn't say them if they weren't true-she's that kind of person, and nurse) but it's hard to believe it yourself when you lack the a) experience and b) confidence. Well I'm sick of writing about my upcoming school and I'm sure any readers who have made it this far have already skimmed over a couple paragraphs. I should probably close in giving a quick blurb about Eric's latest apprenticeship interview. As I may have mentioned, this process has been going on since the end of May. I can't believe he doesn't know yet. Anyway, on Tuesday he had to go in an take a test. He studied up for it, despite having no idea what would actually be on said test. Luckily, he said it was "easy" and is confident he did well. The secretary told him they'd call him sometime next week (ugh, I loathe that phrase, all employers use it, and it's so infuriatingly wishy-washy. Give me him an exact day, god dammit! Don't you know his girlfriend is sitting over here worrying about this!) So, he will probably be calling them next week to follow up, as they don't always get back to him promptly (based on the 3 month long interview process) and usually when he calls to remind them of his existence they say something like "oh yes! Can you come in on XX day at XX time?" Hopefully next week it'll just be "oh yes! We would like to offer you the apprenticeship!" Pessimistic me can't imagine him getting it, but the little echo of optimism is telling the pessimist to shut up and maybe he really has a chance. Hopefully the optimist is right!

Just a check in

Still alive. Enjoying summer vacation. I started nursing school last semester, and somehow survived. It is the craziest journey I have been on thus far. I love it though and look forward to the day when I can really be an RN. I won't graduate until December 2012, so I still have a ways to go. Today a school friend let me know that she won't be back this coming semester, she "dropped out" of nursing school. It makes me very sad, as she was a sassy ray of sunshine (she reminded me so much of a blonde molly ringwald!) and I will really miss her presence. But as she left me know,

 I fulfilled my County Community College* destiny by meeting you, Jane Doe*, and several other nursing students who I hope will continue to be fb friends. I will not be frightened in the least if I wake from surgery and find you over my bed :-)

So that made me feel a little better :)

I have been working part time for my father, he owns an ice cream shop. It's actually not that bad, and I receive tips which of course makes everything better. They really help, my tip money is usually my food money! Other than that, I spend my days just relaxing, laying out, and spending time with my little brother. I don't think I've mentioned him before but I have a 7 year old half-brother who everyone confuses as my son. He has been in this country for a little over a year (the first 6 years of life he lived in China, where his mother is from.) I could write a whole blog just on him, but I really don't have the time at the moment. So I will just conclude that I can understand why children are such a joy (really!) but I can also understand why many parents spank their kids!

Please keep your fingers crossed as on Tuesday, Eric goes to take an exam for an apprenticeship he is trying to get. He's had 3 interviews (over the course of 2.5 months!!) so I just hope he gets it already. We so.need.this.break.

Tomorrow I am joining Weight Watchers. Yay! And with that final, positive, note...I am signing off!

 *names have been changed to protect the innocent!